That is the question that has been going over and over in my mind. What do I say to start back into the blogging world. I think I am having such a hard time because this blog has always been of the happy times in our family for the past year and right now in our lives emotions are up and down. I don't feel like I am a emotional writer and maybe that is another reason why I haven't written until now. I haven't even written in my journal yet because the words are hard to write. But the problem is, I want to. I want to write and remember my feelings. Anyways this probably just sounds like a bunch of rambling and me thinking out loud, but I wanted those who read my blog to understand where I am coming from. And alot of people have asked when I was going to update.
To be honest I am really doing ok. Ok in a sense that I am able to go on with my days and look forward to this little boy coming into our home. There isn't an hour that goes by that I am reminded that Maddie is gone and how that makes me ache, I am also able to remember that it is temporary. I am ok because I have a knowledge of the beautiful Plan of Salvation and the strength of this gospel to lift me up. Heavenly Father has held my hand throughout this whole tragedy and still has not let go. Some of you know but I have been called to be Primary President in my new ward and as some are baffled by this, it was an answer to my prayers. I have loved it and it has kept my days busy. Also, when we found out that we were going to have a little boy, a weight was lifted off of my shoulders and another prayer was answered. I needed to be able to put the girl stuff away for awhile, not erasing Maddie by any means, but a new start to another baby.
This is still going to be a happy blog! I had to clarify where I was coming from and now be able to show we still are having happy times. I will forever miss Maddie in this mortal life as I do everyday but I know she is happy and has her arms open for our reuniting!
20 comments:
I've checked your blog almost everyday, not really expecting you to start right up again, but just out of love. You said you aren't an emotional writer but you made me cry. I admire so much your strength and perspective. Congratulations on your little boy, he is so lucky already. Just think, Maddie is probably telling him all about you. I don't know why I feel like I should say thanks for writing, but thanks. We love you guys!
Sweet Marlo, you are such a strong woman who has a great knowledge and testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I admire the strength that you have to share your feelings and thoughts. You are so right! Heavenly Father knows each of us personally. He knows what each of us need to get through the difficult times in our lives. And yes, your sweet Maddie is telling your new little one all about her mamma and daddy and how much they will love him! Thanks for letting us take a small glimpse into your heart.
What a beautiful testimony of the Savior and the amazing plan of salvation! You have an amazing strength! Thank you for sharing your sweet spirit through this! I really am sorry for your loss! Congrats on the new little one coming into your home! The Lord knows that this little one will be a light in your life, as is your little girl!
Wow. I am completely in awe of this post, Marlo.
Thank you for being brave enough and strong enough to write what you did. It has helped me so much today! I will probably come back and read it again tomorrow.
What a beautiful example of allowing Heavenly Father to bless you with peace and strength through the darkest of times.
I'm so glad you have the happy event of your new little one's arrival to look forward to. Though I know there will always be an ache in your heart for your angel daughter.
Isn't it amazing to think that you are the mother of a perfect little girl? I am so humbled by the thought of my perfect son who is now in Heavenly Father's presence. He will never leave that presence, but I pray that I will come to him someday!
I am so glad you are doing well. I have wondered a lot about you and have sent positive thoughts. Thank you for coming back and congratulations on your baby boy! How fun! Hang in there and I think it's great that you are staying busy with your ward. Bless you.
Courtney
www.adventuresofourfamily.blogspot.com
Marlo, you are absolutely amazing. I love how you said that Heavenly Father has been holding your hand--that is such a wonderful image. It made me think about how He reaches out to us and how you have allowed Him to hold your hand by reaching back through your faith and actions. And I love how you said that Maddie has her arms open for when you meet again...just like she always did when she saw you here:-)
And congrats on your little boy!
You are SO amazing Marlo. I am so glad that you decided how to begin bloggin again. Reading your words helps me strengthen my testimony. The primary children you now take care of are so lucky to have you. I hope your pregnancy is going well and keep us updated!
Allison Waldron (Sutton)
Marlo, I was so touched by your words. You are truly an amazing example to me and I am so thankful you chose to share how things are going with you. I have thought of you and Jordan so often in the last few months and I am so glad to know you are finding peace and feeling the Saviors love for both of you. Congratulations on your little boy. Boys are so much fun!
~Kally~
So glad to see you back at it. I know you don't know me, but I was heartbroken to learn your news and I come back to your blog all the time to see if you are writing again.
Congratulations on your son. You sound like you really have things together right now and I am so happy for you that you do.
Marlo: I stumbled upon your sight on accident, I was on a friend's sight and recognized your last name. After your sight came up I realized I was in the wrong place and didn't know you. But I couldn't take my eyes off of your happy family. Your daughter is absolutely beautiful and your testimony is so strong. May God bless you and your new baby.
Julie Bryce
I think your message is every bit as precious as these darling pictures of Maddie and her family.
I didn't know that you are expecting a new bundle from Heaven but I can understand how a baby boy will lessen the pain as sweet Maddie was such a girlie-girl. Can you even imagine all that she is telling him about his soon-to-be new parents and how excited he must be? Awesome! Isn't Heavenly Father's timing perfect - like all He does - even things that are beyond our mortal comprehension.
It's no nice to see you post again. To be honest, I was worried and prayed for you every chance I got.
Silly me - I knew who was holding you hands and coddling your hearts.
I, like many others have checked your blog over and over to see if there were any new updates. I was happy to see there are. I've been thinking about you and wondering how you are doing. Your family pictures are amazing...truly a treasure. Congratulations on your little guy! Very happy for you and Jordan. Your words were perfect. Thanks for sharing!
you are basically... awesome Marlo. You are such an example to us all. Can't wait to read about the wonderful adventures and happy times that await you're sweet family. I know that maddi will be cheering you on along the way.
As always Marlo...you are amazing, and I'm so glad that you have such an amazing perspective. You are much stronger and wiser than your 25 years. You have been and will be such an awe inspiring example to more people than you can ever imagine. You and Jordan are awesome. You have no idea how much I love, respect, and admire you girl. Love ya
Robyn
I don't know if you rememeber me, but I was Chrissy Anderson...
I just wanted to say that you are truly inspiring. I am so glad you guys are doing well. Congrats on a boy!!
congrats on a baby boy! boys are soooo much fun. glad to hear you guys are doing well. you're amazing examples. i think of you all the time and wonder how you're doing, so thanks for the update!
I try and check in on your blog frequently just to see how you are doing. Sorry doesn't begin to describe how I felt upon hearing about Maddie. But you are so very amazing in your faith and knowledge of the gospel. I agree with your friend who said that your post made my cry. Congratulations on your little boy. I know you were my visiting teacher but please let me know if I can ever do anything for you.
yay...Im so glad you decided to post again. I could never imagine what I would have said, but what you said was beautiful!! You are such an example to me and I look up to you more than you will ever know. I cant wait to meet your little boy!
Marlo,
I know we weren't close in Utah, but that blog post was beautiful! Your faith is huge and you are an example to all of us! Congrats on the baby boy. He'll bring so much joy to your lives!
Marlo,
I began following your blog after I read about your sweet baby girl. Your strength amazed me then and it continues to do so. To see your smiling face and to read your words just further instills what an incredible people both you and your husband are. Your faith is admirable and those who know you are very fortunate to have someone so strong leading them in the way of our Heavenly Father. Please know how much your testimony has impacted so many. I have never met you, yet your story has made a difference in my life. When I look at my three young children and teach them His word, I am reminded that He is there carrying and loving each one of us each and everyday.
Thank you for continuing to share your story and congratulations on your little boy! Your family obviously has so much love to give and Heavenly Father has blessed that baby already by choosing you as his mother.
-Christine
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